511 lines
42 KiB
YAML
511 lines
42 KiB
YAML
>
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{# Morning Briefing #}
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{%- macro getReport() -%}
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<p>
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{% if now().strftime('%H')|int < 12 and now().strftime('%H')|int > 6 %}
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{{ [
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"Good morning. ",
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"Top of the morning to you laddy. ",
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] | random }}
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{% elif now().strftime('%H')|int >= 12 and now().strftime('%H')|int < 17 %}
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{{ [
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"Greetings earthling. ",
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"Good afternoon. ",
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"How do you do, fellow kids? ",
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] | random }}
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{% else %}
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{{ [
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"Good evening. ",
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"The grandest of evenings to you. "
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] | random }}
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if now().strftime('%H')|int < 12 %}
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{% if now().strftime('%M')|int == 0 %}
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It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} AM.
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{% else %}
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It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} {{ now().strftime('%M')|int }} AM.
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{% endif %}
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{% elif now().strftime('%H')|int > 12 %}
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{% if now().strftime('%M')|int == 0 %}
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It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} PM.
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{% else %}
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It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} {{ now().strftime('%M')|int }} PM.
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{% endif %}
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{% else %}
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{{ [
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'Today is ',
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'If you have not been keeping track today is ',
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'Do you know what day of the week it is? Today is',
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'I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but today is '
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]|random }}
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{{states.sensor.today_is.state }}.
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</p>
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<p>
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It is currently {{states.weather.iron_nerd_weather_station.state}} and {{states.sensor.pirateweather_temperature.state|round}} degrees in Defiance.
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if is_state('input_boolean.lightning_warning','on') %}
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{% set ltgdist = (states('sensor.blitzortung_lightning_distance') | int) / 1.609 | round %}
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{{ [
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"There are reports of lightning in the area, please stay safe. ",
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"My sensors detect the presence of lightning nearby, so you should prepare to take shelter if needed. ",
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"A little birdy told me there is lightning nearby. His feathers were all sticking up, I have no idea why. ",
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"Please exercise caution, as there is lightning in the area. ",
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"That flashing in the sky is not interstellar warfare, it is simply lightning. But you should still be careful outside. ",
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] | random }}
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"The nearest lightning strike is {{ ltgdist }} miles away. "
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{% endif %}
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{% if states('sensor.weatheralerts_active_alerts') > '0' %}
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"Currently there are weather alerts active. The total number of alerts is {{ states('sensor.weather_alerts_active_corrected') }}. They are as follows. "
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{{ states('sensor.weather_alert_string') }}.
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{% endif %}
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{% if (states('sensor.kdfi_visibility') | int ) < 3 %}
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{{ [
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"It is foggy outside, please exercise caution when driving. ",
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"The visibility outside is quite low. If you will be driving soon, please be cautious. ",
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"It is pea soup outside right now, and that is just as awful to drive in as it is to eat. Be careful! ",
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"Look out the window. Do you notice that you cannot see anything? Bear that in mind if you intend to drive any time soon. ",
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"Be advised, it is very difficult to see outside right now. Drive safely. "
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] | random }}
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{{ [
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'The rest of the day should be,',
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'Todays forecast should be ,'
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]|random }}
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{{ states('sensor.current_forecast') }}
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</p>
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<p>
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{{ states('sensor.clothing_forecast_detail') }}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if is_state('sensor.halloween_countdown','0') %}
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Happy Halloween!
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.christmas_countdown','0') %}
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Merry Christmas Everyone!
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.anniversary_wedding_anniversary','0') %}
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Happy Anniversary! It been an amazing {{ states.sensor.anniversary_wedding_anniversary.attributes.years }} years!
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('calendar.holidays_in_united_states', 'on') %}
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Today is {{states.calendar.holidays_in_united_states.attributes.message}}.
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{% endif %}
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{% if states.calendar.birthdays.state == 'on' %}
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Today is {{ states.calendar.birthdays.attributes.message }}! So Happy Birthday! The confetti cannon is not working otherwise I would shower you in paper garbage that someone else would have to pick up.
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{% endif %}
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{%- set event=states.calendar.national_holidays.attributes.message %}
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{% if 'Day' in event and 'National' in event%}
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{{ [
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'And a very special Happy ',
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'It is also ',
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'Today is also known as ',
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'Oh <emphasis>Look</emphasis>. Today is ',
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'Want to know a fact? Today is ',
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'Everyday can be a holiday. So today is '
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]|random }}
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{{states.calendar.national_holidays.attributes.message | replace("&"," and ") }}.
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{%- endif -%}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if now().strftime('%Y-%m-%d') == states.input_datetime.school_last_day.state %}
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Congratulations, today is the last day of school! Have an awesome day!
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if is_state('input_boolean.work_today','on') %}
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{{ [
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"Tina must go and please the food gods today ",
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"Today, Tina must go and entertain the gremlins known as her customers and coworkers ",
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"Today, Tina will be owned by our lovely lord and savior, capitalism, starting ",
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"Tina will attempt to satiate the patron saint of capitalism today "
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] | random }} at {{ (state_attr('input_datetime.tina_workday_start','timestamp') | int | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p', False)) }}.
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if is_state('input_boolean.kallen_school_today','on') and is_state('input_boolean.work_today','on') %}
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{% set diff = (state_attr('input_datetime.tina_workday_start','timestamp') - state_attr('input_datetime.kallen_school_day_start','timestamp')) %}
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{%- if states.sensor.home_to_school.state|round > 12 %}
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Traffic to the school appears heavier than normal.
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{% else %}
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Traffic to the school is normal.
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{% endif %}
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Currently it will take {{states.sensor.home_to_school.state|round}} minutes to get to the school.
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{%- if diff <= 3600 %}
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{%- if states.sensor.school_to_bob_evans.state|round > 15 %}
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Traffic from the school to Bob Evans appears heavier than normal.
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{% else %}
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Traffic from the school to Bob Evans is normal.
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{% endif %}
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Currently it will take {{states.sensor.school_to_bob_evans.state|round}} minutes to get to Bob Evans from the school.
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{% endif %}
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{% elif is_state('input_boolean.work_today','on') %}
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{%- if states.sensor.home_to_bob_evans.state|round > 8 %}
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Traffic to Bob Evans appears heavier than normal.
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{% else %}
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Traffic to Bob Evans is normal.
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{% endif %}
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Currently it will take {{states.sensor.home_to_bob_evans.state|round}} minutes to get to Bob Evans.
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{% elif is_state('input_boolean.kallen_school_today','on') %}
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{%- if states.sensor.home_to_school.state|round > 12 %}
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Traffic to the school appears heavier than normal.
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{% else %}
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Traffic to the school is normal.
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{% endif %}
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Currently it will take {{states.sensor.home_to_school.state|round}} minutes to get to the school.
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{% else %}
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It appears no traffic reports are needed today. Enjoy your day off!
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if is_state('input_boolean.tony_streaming_today','on') %}
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{{ [
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"Tony will be pretending to be a real content creator tonight. ",
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"Tony will be doing his best to defeat his impostor syndrome tonight. ",
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"Tony will be playing video games and yelling into a microphone tonight. ",
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"Tony will be scraping out the nickels and dimes tonight for the sake of entertainment. ",
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"Tony is not really all that funny, but tonight he will present himself to a crowd of questionable individuals who seem to think that he is. "
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] | random }} The studio is scheduled to go online at {{ (state_attr('input_datetime.tony_streaming_start_time','timestamp') | int | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p', False)) }}. "
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if is_state('input_boolean.sports_updates','on') %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.michigan_wolverines','PRE') %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','venue') }}. "
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"Kickoff will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','PRE') %}
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{% if state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_abbr') not in ['MICH'] %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','venue') }}. "
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"Kickoff will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.toledo_rockets','PRE') %}
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{% if state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_abbr') not in ['OSU','MICH'] %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The Toledo Rockets will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','venue') }}. "
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"Kickoff will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.minnesota_vikings','PRE') %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The Minnesota Vikings will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','venue') }}. "
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"Kickoff will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','PRE') %}
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{% if state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_abbr') not in ['MIN'] %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The San Francisco 49ers will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','venue') }}. "
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"Kickoff will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.cleveland_guardians','PRE') %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The Cleveland Guardians will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','venue') }}. "
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"First pitch will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.minnesota_twins','PRE') %}
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{% if state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_abbr') not in ['CLE','LAD'] %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The Minnesota Twins will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','venue') }}. "
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"First pitch will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','PRE') %}
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{% if state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_abbr') not in ['CLE'] %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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"The Los Angeles Dodgers will be playing today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_name') }} at {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','venue') }}. "
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"First pitch will be at {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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</p>
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<p>
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{% if is_state('input_boolean.sports_updates','on') %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.michigan_wolverines','POST') %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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{% if (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% else %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
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{% elif yday == date %}
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{% if (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines won their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% else %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines lost their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
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{% endif %}
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{% elif is_state('sensor.michigan_wolverines','IN') %}
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{% if (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% elif (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% else %}
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"The Michigan Wolverines are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.michigan_wolverines','team_score') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% if is_state('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','POST') %}
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{% if state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_abbr') not in ['MICH'] %}
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{% set date = state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
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{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
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{% if (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% else %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
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{% elif yday == date %}
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{% if (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes won their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% else %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes lost their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') }}. "
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{% endif %}
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"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
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{% endif %}
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{% endif %}
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{% elif is_state('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','IN') %}
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{% if state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_abbr') not in ['MICH'] %}
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{% if (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% elif (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') | int) %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') }}. "
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{% else %}
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"The Ohio State Buckeyes are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.ohio_state_buckeyes','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% if is_state('sensor.toledo_rockets','POST') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_abbr') not in ['OSU','MICH'] %}
|
|
{% set date = state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Toledo Rockets won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Toledo Rockets lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% elif yday == date %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Toledo Rockets won their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Toledo Rockets lost their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% elif is_state('sensor.toledo_rockets','IN') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_abbr') not in ['OSU','MICH'] %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Toledo Rockets are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Toledo Rockets are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Toledo Rockets are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.toledo_rockets','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% if is_state('sensor.minnesota_vikings','POST') %}
|
|
{% set date = state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') | int) == state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') | int %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings tied in their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% elif yday == date %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings won their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') | int) == state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') | int %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings tied in their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings lost their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% elif is_state('sensor.minnesota_vikings','IN') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Vikings are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_vikings','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% if is_state('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','POST') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_abbr') not in ['MIN'] %}
|
|
{% set date = state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') | int) == state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') | int %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers tied in their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% elif yday == date %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers won their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') | int) == state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') | int %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers tied in their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers lost their game yesterday against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% elif is_state('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','IN') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_abbr') not in ['MIN'] %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The San Francisco 49ers are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.san_francisco_49ers','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% if is_state('sensor.cleveland_guardians','POST') %}
|
|
{% set date = state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Cleveland Guardians won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Cleveland Guardians lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% elif is_state('sensor.cleveland_guardians','IN') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Cleveland Guardians are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Cleveland Guardians are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Cleveland Guardians are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.cleveland_guardians','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% if is_state('sensor.minnesota_twins','POST') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_abbr') not in ['CLE','LAD'] %}
|
|
{% set date = state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Twins won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Twins lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% elif is_state('sensor.minnesota_twins','IN') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_abbr') not in ['CLE','LAD'] %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Twins are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Twins are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Minnesota Twins are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.minnesota_twins','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% if is_state('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','POST') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_abbr') not in ['MIN'] %}
|
|
{% set date = state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','date') | as_timestamp | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% set yday = (as_timestamp(now()) - (24*3600)) | timestamp_custom('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if date == now().strftime('%m-%d') %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Los Angeles Dodgers won their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Los Angeles Dodgers lost their game today against the {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_name') }} by a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
"This brings their record to {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_record') | replace("-"," and ") }} on the season. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% elif is_state('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','IN') %}
|
|
{% if state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_abbr') not in ['MIN'] %}
|
|
{% if (state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') | int) > (state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Los Angeles Dodgers are currently winning their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% elif (state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') | int) == (state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') | int) %}
|
|
"The Los Angeles Dodgers are currently tied in their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') }}. "
|
|
{% else %}
|
|
"The Los Angeles Dodgers are currently losing their game against the {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_name') }} with a score of {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','opponent_score') }} to {{ state_attr('sensor.los_angeles_dodgers','team_score') }}. "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
</p>
|
|
|
|
<p>
|
|
{{ [
|
|
"Here is a random dad joke ",
|
|
"In case you hadn't had enough idiotic humor today, here is a little more ",
|
|
"For further proof that the developer responsible for my existence is an idiot, I present the following joke ",
|
|
] | random }}<break time="1s"/> {{ states('sensor.random_joke') }}
|
|
</p>
|
|
|
|
<p>
|
|
{% if is_state('input_boolean.briefing_extras','on') %}
|
|
"And now we have the following extra information to pass along. {{ states('input_text.briefing_extras') }} "
|
|
{% endif %}
|
|
</p>
|
|
|
|
{%- endmacro -%}
|
|
|
|
|
|
{# a macro that removes all newline characters, empty spaces, and returns formatted text #}
|
|
{%- macro cleanup(data) -%}
|
|
{%- for item in data.split("\n") if item | trim != "" -%}
|
|
{{ item | trim }} {% endfor -%}
|
|
{%- endmacro -%}
|
|
|
|
{# a macro to call all macros :) #}
|
|
{%- macro mother_of_all_macros() -%}
|
|
{{ getReport() }}
|
|
{%- endmacro -%}
|
|
|
|
{# Call the macro #}
|
|
{{- cleanup(mother_of_all_macros()) -}} |