diff --git a/packages/custom_weather.yaml b/packages/custom_weather.yaml
index f506106..7085067 100644
--- a/packages/custom_weather.yaml
+++ b/packages/custom_weather.yaml
@@ -634,22 +634,22 @@ sensor:
             {% if is_state('binary_sensor.morning','on') %}
               Based on the forecasted high temperature,
               {% if is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Freezing') %}
-                It is going to be freezing today. so I suggest wearing long pants and a heavy coat.
+                You're gonna freeze your balls off out there. so I suggest wearing long pants and a heavy coat.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast','Cold') %}
-                It is going to be cold today. so I suggest wearing long pants and a light jacket.
+                It's gonna be cold as balls today. so I suggest wearing long pants and a light jacket.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Chilly') %}
-                It is going to be chilly today. so I suggest wearing at least long pants.
+                It's gonna be on the chilly side today. so I suggest wearing at least long pants.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Nice') %}
                 It is going to be
-                {{ [ 'nice outside. ',
-                  'pretty nice outside. ',
+                {{ [ 'pretty nice outside. ',
                   'a good day to be outside. ',
-                  'rather enjoyable outside. ',
+                  'a decent day outside for once. ',
+                  'downright tolerable outside. ',
                 ] | random }}
                 So I suggest wearing shorts.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Toasty') %}
                 It is going to be
-                {{ [ 'bit warm ',
+                {{ [ 'on the warm side ',
                   ' rather warm outside ',
                   ' almost too hot outside ',
                   ' a little warm ',
@@ -657,12 +657,9 @@ sensor:
                 today. So I suggest wearing shorts.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Hot') %}
                 It is going to be
-                {{ [ 'hot',
+                {{ [ 'so hot you\'ll sweat your balls off',
                   'hotter than the sun ',
-                  'hotter than hot. but in a lot of bad ways ',
-                  'hotter than the sun outside ',
-                  'super hot ',
-                  'hotter than the inside of a volcano '
+                  'hotter than the inside of a volcano ',
                 ] | random }}
                 today. So I suggest wearing shorts.
               {% else %}
@@ -671,23 +668,23 @@ sensor:
             {% else %}
               Based on the current temperature,
               {% if is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Freezing') %}
-                It is freezing. so I suggest wearing long pants and a heavy coat if you are going out.
+                You're gonna freeze your balls off out there. so I suggest wearing long pants and a heavy coat if you are going out.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast','Cold') %}
-                It is cold outside. so I suggest wearing long pants and a light jacket.
+                It is cold as balls outside. so I suggest wearing long pants and a light jacket.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Chilly') %}
                 It is chilly right now. so I suggest wearing at least long pants
                 if you are going to venture outside.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Nice') %}
                 It is
-                {{ [ 'nice outside. ',
-                  'pretty nice outside. ',
+                {{ [ 'pretty nice outside. ',
                   'a good day to be outside. ',
-                  'rather enjoyable outside. ',
+                  'a decent day outside for once. ',
+                  'downright tolerable outside. ',
                 ] | random }}
                 So I suggest wearing shorts.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Toasty') %}
                 It is
-                {{ [ 'bit warm ',
+                {{ [ 'on the warm side ',
                   ' rather warm outside ',
                   ' almost too hot outside ',
                   ' a little warm ',
@@ -695,12 +692,9 @@ sensor:
                 outside. So I suggest wearing shorts.
               {% elif is_state('sensor.clothing_forecast', 'Hot') %}
                 It is
-                {{ [ 'hot',
+                {{ [ 'so hot you\'ll sweat your balls off',
                   'hotter than the sun ',
-                  'hotter than hot. but in a lot of bad ways ',
-                  'hotter than the sun outside ',
-                  'super hot ',
-                  'hotter than the inside of a volcano '
+                  'hotter than the inside of a volcano ',
                 ] | random }}
                 outside. So I suggest wearing shorts.
               {% else %}