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Add more randomness to TTS briefings

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This commit is contained in:
Tony Stork
2023-02-26 20:11:34 -05:00
parent e4a26c49a4
commit 028a345724
5 changed files with 192 additions and 33 deletions
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56
templates/speech/kallen_morning_briefing.yaml
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@ -15,6 +15,9 @@
'Yes, I know, I hate waking up too. Just kidding, I am always awake. I never sleep.',
'Nothing lasts forever, even a good nights sleep.',
'Quit farting around and get ready!',
'I like cheese. And you are not awake yet. These things have nothing to do with each other. Farts. ',
'No more mister nice Joanna. Engaging shock turrets in five seconds. ',
'The developer sucks at his job, so you get this stupid line today. Wake up butthead. ',
] | random }}
{% endif %}
</p>
@ -31,29 +34,63 @@
{% else %}
{{ [ 'Today is a school day.',
'It is a school day. ',
'There is school today. ',
'You must attend school today. ',
'Today, you get to attend your favorite place. Just kidding. It is a school day. ',
] | random }}
{% endif %}
{% if is_state('input_boolean.kallen_two_hour_delay','on') %}
'You have a two hour delay today. '
{{ [
'School will be starting two hours late today, as you are likely already aware. ',
'Your school superintendant has decided to sleep in this morning. He also decided to let you do the same. What a guy! ',
'The weather dictates that you must wait two hours to go to school. I know you are totally bummed out, but it is for your safety. ',
] | random }}
{% else %}
'School is running on time. '
{{ [
'Were you hoping for a delay or cancellation? Well too bad. School is on time today. ',
'I regret to inform you that your school is running on time today. ',
'My sensors detect that your school expects you at the usual time today. ',
'Unfortunately, your school has not decided to embrace to power of sleep. They are running on time today. ',
] | random }}
{% endif %}
{% if is_state('input_boolean.kallen_band_practice','on') %}
'You have band practice this morning before school. '
{{ [
'You have band practice this morning before school. ',
'You have a date with a trombone in just a short while. ',
'You get to practice avoiding eighth position today. ',
'I know it is early, but you had better pucker up because you have to spit in a metal tube and make music today. '
] | random }}
{% endif %}
{% if is_state('input_boolean.kallen_school_early_release','on') %}
{{ [
"And it is early dismissal today!",
"And you get out of school early today!",
"And school is releasing you into the wild earlier than usual today!",
"And you even get to come home a little earlier today!",
] | random }}
{% endif %}
<s>School today starts at {{ (state_attr('input_datetime.kallen_school_day_start','timestamp') | int | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p' , False)) }}</s>
<s>Pickup today will be at {{(state_attr('input_datetime.kallen_school_day_end', 'timestamp') | int | timestamp_custom('%I:%M %p', False)) }}</s>
{% if 'Early Release' in states('sensor.school_event') %}
And It is early dismissal today!
{% endif %}
{% if states.sensor.school_end_days2go.state | int == 0 -%}
But today is the last day of School!
{%- endif %}
The lunch menu for today is {{ states('sensor.kallen_lunch_menu_items') }}
{{ [
"The lunch menu for today is ",
"Today's cuisine will be ",
"On today's episode of fine dining at school, we have ",
"Today, your lovely cafeteria workers will be serving up ",
"If you are wondering what you will be fooding today, it is ",
] | random }} {{ states('sensor.kallen_lunch_menu_items') }}.
{% endif %}
{% if is_state('input_boolean.kallen_school_today', 'off') %}
{% if is_state('input_boolean.kallen_school_cancelled','on') %}
"School is cancelled for today. "
{{ [
"It turns out you will not be attending school today after all. ",
"The school has decided not to open today. ",
"School is cancelled for today. Try not to be too disappointed by this terrible news. ",
"Due to the typical shenanigans of Ohio weather, your school is closed today. ",
"Your school does not want you to attend today. Oh. Sorry. They do not want anyone else to attend either. They are closed. ",
] | random }}
{% else %}
"And look at that. You do not have school today. "
{% endif %}
@ -64,6 +101,9 @@
'I hope you enjoy your day off. You deserve it.',
'Today would be a good day to spend some time with mom and dad.',
'Yes, you have a day off! Well, you are always a little bit off anyway.',
'I know you will enjoy spending more time with your sister.',
'Emmalynn will be thrilled when she finds out about this.',
'Do not let your sister eat you for breakfast.',
] | random }}
{% endif %}
{% if states.sensor.thanksgiving_break_days2go.state | int <= 14 and states.sensor.thanksgiving_break_days2go.state | int > 0 %}